Fatherhood with Humor- Because Fatherhood Isn't Always Serious Business6:57 PM
Fatherhood with Humor - that is how I would describe my husband's fatherhood style with my children. Although he takes his responsibilities and duties as a father quite seriously, he never fails to put in some dose of humor and play as he tries with me to raise our children well. In our family set-up, it seems to be that the role of the strict parent has been left especially for me.
The Traditional Father Role
During my own growing up years, my own father was the picture of the strict disciplinarian parent. One look from him was enough to remind me that I should behave. Joking with him was kind of unthinkable for me. The boundaries were very clear between a parent and a child.
As I grew older though, my father learned to relax a bit from his rigid father posturing. I couldn't really blame him though with his traditional way as it was the prevailing way during his own time. I can't help but see the difference between fathers then and now as more fathers today try to act more like friends than parents.
I am all for this friendship thing between parents and children but respect for the status of the parent should never be lost along the way. Family psychologists are encouraging parents to do likewise for better family relations. It has to be remembered though that children still need parents to be parents.
This means that children can still expect guidance from a responsible adult. Children with their young minds need parents to say no when it is needed. Respectful friendship is about being able to say what is necessary as well as being able to enforce rules and standards with no love lost because of doing so.
Fatherhood with Humor
Part of being friends with children is the capacity to humor them. Young children especially, follow more easily when dealt with through some play time and use of imagination. Humoring older children involves thinking at their level and seeing things in their young perspective.
When fathers give time for play, relaxation, and bonding with their children, they are able to forge ties that are not easily broken. It provides children good memories to look back to. It makes children remember them in a very comforting and loving way.
When my own children look for their father first, I would know that what they need has something to do with play and fun things to do. I get more nervous when they look for me first since that would mean serious matters are at hand. It would be a common scenario at home when we are complete for my husband and my two young children to be watching TV or playing board games while I do my writing work. Schoolwork time means I take over.
That said, while I do acknowledge the need for myself to be more playful and relaxed with my children. I am grateful that it comes naturally with my husband. I have never seen a father so dedicated with his children that I once said to him that if he was half as much dedicated to me, everything would be well with us. LOL!